The Enterprise's Encyclopaedia of Furry Critters
by Dancingdog
Summary: A collection of unrelated A to Z short stories that run through various crew members meeting cute, cuddly and occasionally unpleasant animals whilst on their travels around the galaxy. Genres will vary throughout. 26 chapters in total, but will add more if anyone wants a different animal.
1. A

_A/N: I'm starting an A to Z guide of animals that the crew meet on their travels so if there are any in particular you want me to write, don't hesitate to comment. If the letter has already been done but not with the animal you would like, comment and I will add it to the end of the 26 chapters. :) Enjoy! P.S. I don't own anyone or anything here: if I did, you'd know about it!_

* * *

**A**

"Come on, Bones. It's easy!" Shouted an excited James T. Kirk as he bounced onto another large boulder protruding from the surface of the exceptionally wide, stagnant river.

"Jim, I'm tellin' you: it's not safe to go hoppin' around like that!" Replied the Southern drawl of a wary Chief Medical Officer.

The young Captain laughed at the older man's caution before jumping to yet another, more slippery rock, after which he stumbled and very nearly fell into the muddy, stationary water, but managed to catch himself before tumbling headfirst into it.

"Careful, Jim," came the quiet voice of Starfleet's best First Officer, earning himself a cocky grin from the young Captain and a cheeky "Yes, mother."

Upon hearing the doctor's _"hmph"_, Kirk peered at his two friends from his vantage point on one of the rocks on the far side of the river and called out, "It's shore leave on a completely peaceful planet, there's only the three of us here; everyone else is exploring the planet's more _'interesting'_ features, yet you two only seem to want to sulk. Lighten up! You're supposed to be relaxing! Besides, what's the worse that could happen?"

"With your luck? We'll be eaten by a river monster by the end of the day," teased McCoy.

Jim rolled his eyes good-naturedly and replied, "Whatever you say, Doc."

Kirk prepared to jump onto the next long, low-lying, jagged rock and with an expert leap, landed on all fours on the rough surface. He stood up shakily and flashed a dazzling grin at his comrades. "See? Nothing to worry about!"

Scarcely were the words out of his mouth when the stone began to move as more of its surface became exposed and Kirk started to lose his balance. A low growl was heard followed by a large splash and a yelp from a now very wet Captain.

Both Spock and McCoy jolted, startled by the sound and whirled around to face the Captain-less rock. McCoy startled to chuckle at the sopping wet Kirk but promptly shut his mouth as he watched the elongated stone turn and glide towards his friend. Spock's eyebrow began to rise as the upper part of the rock broke away from the bottom, as if on a hinge, to reveal lots of small, sharp, white pebbles aiming at the coughing a spluttering Jim.

Only then did the penny drop for McCoy.

"**JIM!** GET OUT OF THE WATER!" Bellowed a panic-stricken voice.

Now, the Captain was not stupid by any means, but being taken by surprise, dumped in a cold, murky river, disorientated by the fall, shouted at and upon spotting hundreds of knife-like, white points heading rapidly in his direction causes even a strong man like James Tiberius Kirk to act rather dumbly.

Kirk did try to escape from the river but unfortunately, he chose the bank upon which McCoy and Spock were standing, making for a longer swimming distance and allowing the time the alligator-like creature needed to snap violently at Jim's heels.

Fortunately, Kirk was wasn't a bad swimmer and managed to near the bank with little harm done, immediately after which both Spock and McCoy hauled their poor Captain out of the unforgiving depths, but not before the reptile managed to tear a souvenir out of the bottom of his trousers.

The trio backed away from the water's edge (with Kirk beginning to shiver) as the alligator fixed them with a deathly stare, mouth gaping.

Jim shrunk in on himself between his two friends and the good Doctor took pity on him.

"C'mon, Jim. Lets go back to the _Enterprise_ and get you warmed up."

Kirk smiled gratefully as all three started to walk in the direction of the ship.

A few moments later, Kirk noticed his unusually quiet Science Officer was frowning thoughtfully.

"What are you thinking about, Spock?"

The half-vulcan frowned more deeply and glanced to his Captain to answer.

"I recall reading that alligators can sprint up to thirty miles per hour when on land, even though they cannot maintain it..."

A lone bird, perched in the safety of a treetop, watched innocently as a gold and two blue blurs raced across the grassland; a large, dirty green slab rapidly catching up behind them.


	2. B

**B**

"Aren't they beautiful?" Cooed Uhura as she watched a young butterfly discard its chrysalis and open its orange and oak patterned wings for the first time.

Sulu trimmed his newly acquired Buddleia (or 'butterfly bush' as it had now been dubbed by an awed Uhura) and smiled at the Communications Officer's expression.

Chekov, on the other hand, stared sceptically at the plant and its inhabitants. "They're just bugs, Nyota, and they're eating your plant, Hikaru."

Sulu chuckled, "And whilst I am a little annoyed at the prospect of losing half of my specimen, I have gained another species to study, even if it was unknowingly."

"You won't hurt them, will you?" Asked Uhura in a genuinely concerned tone of voice as a bright white butterfly found a comfortable spot on her index finger.

"Not at all," assured Sulu as he watered the violet-flowered Buddleia. Uhura hummed in contentment as the small creature decided to explore her arm.

Chekov watched the insect with a blank look. "Vhy are you so interested in them?"

"Well, when I was younger, my mother would take my siblings and I to an open field a couple of miles away from where we lived. There were hundreds of butterflies and caterpillars fluttering and crawling around. We used to make a game out of how many we could catch in our hands. We would never hurt them and we would always let them go in the end, but whoever caught the most would get an extra cookie at suppertime! I guess they remind me of home..." Uhura trailed off as the memories came flooding back to her. Sulu offered her a sympathetic expression as he watched the emotions playing across her face.

Chekov frowned thoughtfully as he tried to coax a young red and white insect to crawl onto his hand only for it to flit away easily.

Uhura, suddenly snapped out of her reminiscences, giggled pleasantly and said "here, like this," before gently cupping the young navigator's hands and helping him to catch his intended target. The young man's face lit up comically as the small creature crawled from the palm of his hand to the inside of his elbow and settled there.

"It tickles!" Exclaimed Chekov in delight as his friends laughed at the ecstatic expression on his face.

"Ve used to have loads of these in Russia. Of course, they vere a lot bigger and you couldn't catch them so easily, but I've never held one before," grinned the young man, transfixed on the tiny butterfly.

Sulu and Uhura shared a knowing glance before the golden-clad scientist asked cheekily, "So Pavel, do you like them now?"

A few moments of hesitation before: "...Vell, they are rather pretty."

* * *

_A/N: Used to do this with my grandparents when I was little (So many feels!) :) I know it's short, but the next one is rather a lot longer, so consider this 'light reading' ;)_


	3. C

**C**

"Engineerin' t' bridge!"

"Kirk here. What is it Scotty?"

"There's somethin' playin' havoc with me controls down here! It keeps eatin' its way through all me components and ye wanna see the state of the wirin'! It'll take hours t' fix!" Fumed the CEO.

"What seems to be doing the damage?"

"Errr... well..." the Scotsman sounded sheepish and his voice had lowered a few decibels, "it _seems_ t' be somethin' akin t' a..." the Engineer trailed off, muttering something unintelligible even to Spock's acute hearing.

"What was that, Scotty?" Asked Kirk amusedly.

A deep inhalation was heard from the speaker before a quiet "Somethin' akin t' a _tribble_," was uttered.

Kirk sat bolt upright in his chair and sharply asked "What did you say, Lieutenant-Commander?"

Mr. Scott gulped, "A tribble, Cap'n."

"You're sure? You're positive that you saw this thing doing the damage?" Kirk growled in an almost predatory manner.

Mr. Scott nodded gravely.

Then he realised that even in this century you can't be seen nodding over a speaker system of any sort, and instead replied with a crisp "Aye, Sir." There were a few moments of hesitation, during which young Chekov wondered if it was possible for a Starship Captain to spontaneously combust out of sheer resentment for small balls of fluff, before Scotty amended, "Well, I didn'ae actually see the _whole _creature, Cap'n; just a glimpse of grey fur, but it was roughly the same size and shape as yer average tribble."

The silence on the bridge end of the intercom was unnerving for the Chief Engineer, even more so was the calm and sudden way in which Kirk replied, "Thankyou, Mr. Scott. That will be all."

All eyes up on the bridge were trained on the blank face of the Captain. If he weren't all that bothered about losing a limb (or part of one), McCoy would be checking for a pulse on the unmoving body. In knowing James T. Kirk rather well, McCoy made the intelligent decision of keeping well away from the internally seething man.

"_I thought I ordered all tribbles off this ship,_" enunciated Kirk slowly and precisely.

"...You did, Sir," assured a brave Sulu.

"_Then why do I have one in engineering?_"

Jim's tone was beginning to get excessively disconcerting at this point. Fortunately, Spock was there to rescue the floundering crew.

"Would you prefer me to locate the organism, Captain?"

"If you're not too busy, that would be an _ideal _course of action, Commander." You could practically _see_ the sarcasm dripping from Kirk's mouth.

Choosing to ignore the jest, Spock referred to his scanner after flicking a few switches on one of the engineering panels on the far side of the bridge. He lingered at his station only a few seconds before returning to the engineering panels to find a hazard light blinking amber. Satisfied, he turned his attention back to the Captain. "The creature is currently isolated on level two engineering in sector C's third condensing unit."

Without a word, Kirk swiftly leapt to his feet and glided to the turbo lift, the doors closing silently behind him.

The bridge crew glanced nervously at each other but quickly continued with their work after a raised eyebrow from a certain half-vulcan. Even McCoy was wise enough to retreat to sickbay without an argument.

* * *

Scotty trailed sheepishly behind Captain Kirk's impression of the grim reaper. The way the younger man had stalked into engineering to retrieve his CEO would give their subordinates enough horror stories to last them an entire month.

Kirk stopped dead in front of one of the smooth, low-lying condensers, giving it a spiteful glare before staring expectantly at Scotty. The Scotsman quickly jumped into action and, using his spanner and ratchet, prised the domed lid of the condenser off. Kirk snatched the shivering, wet lump of fur out of the unit and gripped it tightly, but upon hearing a pained whimper, loosened his hold slightly.

Scotty was in the midst of checking the cooling unit for any damage when he was startled by a surprised yelp from the Captain.

"Are ye alright, Cap'n?"

"It bit me!"

"...Sir...tribbles have no teeth..."

"Well it's got sharp fur!"

The two men peered at the squeaking creature lying in Kirk's (now bleeding) hand.

"...That's not a tribble, Cap'n..."

"...I don't suppose it is..."

"...Actually, it's rather cute..."

"...It is, isn't it?"

* * *

A few hours later (and several checks for rabies in both the animal and Kirk completed by Doctor McCoy) found the Captain sitting back on the bridge, therapeutically petting a young and happily purring, ash-coloured chinchilla, whom had found a comfortable and warming bed in Jim's lap.


End file.
